As I’ve mentioned here before, I’ve been in the trenches of cyber-dating for a decade now. I’ve had some great experiences, some not-so-great, some just downright nuts, but overall I’m glad I’ve done it. But I’m thinking I might be done.
A few weekends ago, I was writing to a man in Minneapolis who seemed really nice, but came with lots of baggage (two pre-teen daughters and a crazy Russian ex-wife. Seriously. He’s a former Russian language professor, so he really did have a crazy Russian ex-wife.). Now, I realize that you don’t live three and a half decades without acquiring some baggage, and I know I’ve got my own. But mine is cute and it matches. 🙂 Seriously, that wasn’t what put the nail in the coffin of this correspondence and resulted in my yanking my profile down off this site. It was something way more shallow.
This man was sharing with me his exercise plans for the weekend, and said he felt so much more energized now that his weight was down to 150 pounds from 165.
Y’all, 165 is my goal weight.
And I’m German and a former ballerina, so I can squat 150. Without breaking a sweat.
I read that in his message, and I was just kinda all done. It’s like – that’s it. That did it for me. I give up. I just don’t have the energy anymore to keep looking for a man who loves Jesus and giant redheaded women. It seems increasingly less likely that he’s even out there, and even less likely that I’m going to find him through my laptop.
Except I didn’t really give up. I succumbed a few days later to the ubiquitous advertising during “Say Yes to the Dress” (which my mother makes me watch against my will) and put a brief profile up on Match.com. No photo, brief answers, but enough to take a look around. And the next morning I received an e-mail with potential matches.
Once of which was my former boss.
DONE.
I think I actually slammed the laptop shut and pushed my chair away from the desk, and I certainly thanked the sweet Lord that I didn’t have my photo up. And took that as further confirmation that I should be taking a break from my online search for love.
So, what say you, Internet friends – should I be done with cyber-dating? Is it really giving up on my dreams of marriage and adorable redheaded babies? (It kinda feels like it.) Would you join me in prayer that Mr. Ivy Sprague really is out there – and that he outweighs me? 🙂
I would not give up. My cousin did dating websites for years herself and was about ready to quit a year and a half ago when someone talked her into Eharmony and she met the man of her dreams, whom she married last month. She is 48 and like a teenager again. Plus, who needs a guy for kids? In a perfect world, a kid would have two parents, but it’s not required or, in my real life experience, detrimental. How many kids/babies are neglected in unloved limbo in foster homes or orphanages across the world? Too many to count without pulling at one’s heartstrings. You would be a wonderful mom to a child whether they have your red hair or not 🙂